Every once in a while I untangle the mysteries of the universe enough to identify and legitimize a decree of things to be and the ways of existence.  I call these my “Rules of Life”.  Below are a few examples, as I uncover more, it is only right I declare them to the world here.  Here are some Rules of Life:

• Whoever was responsible for the cell phone call being dropped is the one that has to call back
• Whoever was responsible for the cell phone call being dropped is the one that has to call back
• If someone calls twice in a row without leaving a message, it is an emergency
• One long honk of the horn means I’m pissed off, but two short honks just mean “hey friend, I see you”
• It is never ok to pass all the cars waiting in line for the exit ramp and then try to squeeze in last minute. However, in case of emergency, you can always beat out a slow-accelerating semi truck
• Dress shirts should never be worn twice in the same week, but pants can be worn M-F without concern
• 10 items or less really means anything that fits in a small hand-cart